Wikipedia:Peer review/Sydney Riot of 1879/archive1
I'd like to bring this article up to FA status. Any advice/assistance would be appreciated, jguk 15:16, 5 Feb 2005 (UTC)
- Some issues I noticed:
- 1. First two sentences don't make much sense - perhaps they should be expanded to a larger paragraph with more information about the "early riots" and what the England-Australia tours were.
- 2. Perhaps a "pitch invasion" could be explained a little bit.
- 3. A N Hornby should be more formally introduced; we don't hear about him at all before he is dropped into the middle of the story.
- 4. "Nearly one hundred and thirty years later, bad umpiring decisions and betting continue to scandalise the sport." 3rd paragraph of "the game" - doesn't make sense, doesn't seem to fit in here. Talk more about the allegations against the bookmakers. More reponses from other newspapers and others involved would be helpful too.
- 5. remove "as we shall see", not encyclopedic language, 4th paragraph "the game"
- 6. I'm not sure about keeping those two letters intact - could they be summarized and quoted instead?
- 7. More info on the aftermath, if possible
- 8. In general, more images would be helpful (any team photos anywhere? photos of the field where the game was played?)
That's what I can see for now... I'll take another look after you make some headway... --Spangineer ∞ 20:44, Feb 5, 2005 (UTC)
- Apologies for not looking at these earlier. I'm now working my way through them, and this response will, shortly, cover all 8 points:
- 1. I've expanded the first paragraph and tweaked the sentences.
- 2. I think this phrase has now been removed.
- 3. I've added a subordinate clause offering a factoid about Hornby, who has his own article for those who want to know more.
- 4. I have removed the offending sentence.
- 5. This is no longer in the article.
- 6. I've put them onto Wikisource. However, the letters are very interesting and add a lot to the tale. Wisden at the time felt it was worth devoting the space to them despite space being at a premium. I'm getting a new book that's a diary of one of the English players who played in the match, and Ianbrown's checking his library for what should be a good Australian source - we'll have to see afterwards whether the full text of the letters can be dispensed with, but at the moment I'm loath to lose them.
- 7. I've slightly expanded this. Of course, the letters themselves are part of the aftermath and these are quoted above. In the end, money won out - English clubs were missing out on cash by not playing the Australians, so they had to back down somehow.
- 8. Put simply, I haven't been able to find any photos. I have a number of books that cover the era and have searched on the internet - I can't see any team photos and none of what the SCG looked like at that time.
jguk 21:42, 2 Mar 2005 (UTC)